One of the things that no one is going to tell you, because it all sounds really bleak, is that life is going to continuously kick you. Feeling down? Have another boot to the psyche! Feeling stressed? Surprise! You totally forgot about that annual bill and it just over drafted your account! Hope you like ramen, bitch!
While the whole prospect of it is incredibly daunting, people still go through massive amounts of sad. Sometimes when everything feels like it’s never going to get better, people often wonder why they even bother.
But you know what? Things improve and give you a moments respite from the dark walls of depression. Maybe it’s a hug from a friend, maybe it’s a baby using you as a jungle gym and then a place for vomit. Maybe it’s dressing like a pirate and blockading a Krispy Kreme to get some free doughnuts.
Sadness is real. It is the yang to the yin that is happiness. What is so hard to remember when it feels like you’re drowning is that there will eventually be a breath of fresh air.
The difference between those that give up and those that soldier through it is hope. Or stubbornness. Either way, there is a phenomenal sense of accomplishment when you make it through. While my initial mindset is to be pessimistic, there is optimism somewhere inside me telling me that there is so much more I need to experience while I can. So yeah. Hope. That’s awesome.
Today, I wrote for the first time in a year. A YEAR. I’m not talking about blog posts as you get those every now and again like lovely little reminders that I’m not dead yet. I mean that I started writing something for a story I wanted to start writing. Confused? GREAT!
I got the biggest complement when a coworker offered to read it. I sent her something completely fictional and her reply was “I’m confused. The email you sent me sounds like it’s a news article.” That is EXACTLY how I wanted it to read and it gave me such a sense of accomplishment. I had forgotten how much I love writing.
I think I stopped due to the fact that I have been doing all of the things during the beautiful season in Oregon. I’ve also succumbed to the wanderlust and am murdering my summer with travel.
In two weeks I will be headed to California to see a bunch of friends and have every intention of murdering live band karaoke. Any requests?
Sorry for the strange update. That’s all I have for the moment.